“The ability to observe without evaluating is the highest form of intelligence” – Jiddu Krishnamurti
That makes no sense to me.
I don’t understand why they did that.
Why would anyone do that?
That’s irrational.
That’s illogical.
That’s ridiculous.
Have you ever had those thoughts about someone?
Of course you have. We all do. It’s normal.
When we can’t understand someone’s behaviour, we tend to think there’s something wrong with them or their decision-making process.
And we judge them for it.
If it’s a family member or a friend, we ‘ll probably tell them.
If it’s a client we usually won’t. But it’s almost impossible to hide judgement. It leaks out in our tone and facial micro-expressions. Humans evolved to detect the tiniest perceptions of threat. Don’t think it won’t show or they won’t notice. It does and they will. And nobody likes to feel judged. That leads to defensiveness and disengagement.
So, how do you stop judging your clients?
Every behaviour is learned and serves a purpose. The purpose may be subconscious and the individual may not know why they do it, but there is always a reason. Otherwise, the behaviour would not have evolved.
So, when somebody does something that makes no sense, what that means is that you don’t understand enough about them and what’s driving that particular behaviour – what is its purpose.
You now have a choice. You can judge it or you can get curious about it.
You can move from:
That’s makes no sense. Why would anyone do that?
To:
That’s interesting. I wonder why they do that?
The best way to stop judging your clients and their financial decisions is to get curious about them. Curiosity has a completely different energy. It’s positive and engaging and displaces judgement.
And the best way to get curious, is to learn what drives money behaviour. It will transform your relationships because your clients will feel heard and understood, not judged.
I can teach you how to do this. Schedule a call to find out more or have a look at the training options.
