“When it came to money, I always felt like I was on the kids table.”
The real adults were on a different table.
That’s one of the fascinating things a client told me during a money coaching session.
And this feeling of ‘not-good-enoughness’ affected their ability to articulate and claim their full worth.
“Other people could earn proper money. My capability was limited to getting by.”
The way money is discussed makes it all seem about numbers. But it isn’t.
Finance is numbers. Money is beliefs and values.
And if one of those beliefs is ‘I’m not good enough to be financially successful’, then you won’t be.
Beliefs drive behaviours.
So, where do these beliefs about money come from?
They come from the behaviour of the people around you in early childhood.
You don’t consciously choose your beliefs.
You look at what goes on around you and create meaning from it. You do this because you are trying to understand how the world works and how you can fit in.
When it comes to money, a lot of the behaviour you see is reactive and messy.
You see conflict, contradiction, confusion.
And you’re trying and make sense of it without understanding the context and with a brain that doesn’t fully develop till your twenties.
So, while there may be some truth in your beliefs, they hardly ever represent the full picture.
And often you get given very clear messages about yourself:
“You’re useless with money”.
Or, more simply:
“You’re useless”.
But these messages are the projections of other people. There is no truth to them.
You adapt your behaviour as you grow up. You can do the same with your beliefs.
Because your beliefs should be based on who you are – not other people’s opinions or behaviour.
My client changed their money beliefs and moved to the adults table.
What beliefs would you like to change?
If you want change your money beliefs, let’s have a chat
If you’d like to learn how to explore your clients money beliefs, we have a number of CPD approved courses.
